Pros and Cons

I wrote the following as a LinkedIn Article, but I think the idea serves for anyone who uses lists of pros and cons to make a decision.

Yesterday I needed to work through one of those tough managerial decisions that occasionally come up. As an engineering manager most of the managerial decisions are relatively easy to make. There are Nordstrom engineering standards, compliance standards, and many best practices for most of what the developers do. The most difficult part of those decisions is really just keeping up with the standards and practices.

The people management decisions are made using a mix of sympathy or empathy given the situation, past experience, and for me, having a background in psychology. Some of that can be learned, but I think the key is empathy: Put yourself into the position of the employee you are supporting and ask yourself how you would like to be treated in that situation.

I'm going astray from my purpose for writing this, which concerns making those difficult decisions as a manager. I've learned a practice that you all are probably familiar with to help make decisions like these, though with an added element: a Pros and Cons list.

Typically when we use a list of Pros and Cons to making the decision, we use the viewpoint of making a change in the status quo and the effects, positive and negative, that change has on our situation. What we don't typically do is also evaluate not making a change or even not making a decision at all and leaving the status quo. Adding that element to this practice has made creating a Pros and Cons list much more valuable to me in decision making.

I'll use a personal decision rather than a managerial decision as an example: Having bought our condo in Cape Canaveral, I was weighing driving my car to have and use down there versus continuing to Uber to and from the airport there or renting a car when we are there. I made a Pros and Cons list beginning with the positives and negatives of having a car in Florida, including the initial act of driving it down there. On the negative side, it was a very long drive down there. On the positive side, that drive down got me an opportunity to see a good deal of country I haven't seen or don't often see including seeing my cousin in Nashville. (It also meant seeing a lot of Kansas, which I'm not sure quite fit into the assets column.) On the plus side, we would save money. Even renting monthly parking down there, with Jen being an airline employee, was cheaper than a one-way Uber from the Orlando airport to Cape Canaveral. On the negative side it left us with one fewer car here in Colorado, particularly a car for the snow, as we would just have the Rogue and the Camaro.

That's how we all typically do a Pros and Cons list. Then, though, I added the additional perspective of what were the advantages and disadvantages to NOT driving my car down. Some of these were merely the opposite of the first list. We would spend more money when we went to Florida Ubering or renting a car. I would not get to need to make a long drive, but I would also not get to see the middle of Kansas. Then a thought struck me: by leaving the car in Colorado it wouldn't be subject to the salt air of Florida and save some life of the car. Being exposed to salt air is really a negative of taking the car down, but I hadn't thought of it at the time. The different perspective brought that out. Maybe it was that I was geared to see the benefits of a situation more than seeing the disadvantages. Sometimes having that different perspective can help you see that there are more disadvantages to a change or advantages to not making a change than you saw at first. Or perhaps vice-versa if you are more inclined to see the negatives in a situation. 

Ultimately I chose to make the drive down and leave the car. I could always change my mind later and drive back to see how Kansas had progressed in the interim. I'm happy to say that so far the decision to take the car down has been a good one.

There are a lot of managerial decisions I could use the practice on as well. Is this employee best to work on this new system or better off where they are? Does it make sense to update this version of the database now or leave it as is? Should we deploy this new software version in this sprint or do more testing? Put yourself into each situation you are considering and make a list of positives and negatives for each situation in order to gain perspective on your decision.

Unpacking, series 1 episode 4, Odds N Ends

The Domo-kun plush is a travelling companion that I picked up at the Japan pavilion at EPCOT. He brings me joy. Domo kind of serves as my emotional support, an emotional support monster, if you will, when Jen or Buck isn't with me. I have needed that support, frankly, in the past particularly when travelling for work. Just having that snarling yet joyful face to spark a tiny bit of happiness in me when I need it.

I had pulled a big handful of scraps of paper from my bulletin board in my office. There are a few post-its with inspirational or otherwise meaningful sayings on them. There are a few addresses of people that I like to write to once in a while, well very infrequently. I like hand-writing little notes, especially postcards, and I want to do that more often. There are a couple other little mementos that I keep on my bulletin board. For example, I have the ticket stub from the baseball game that I drove home drunk from and got my DUI. A reminder of where I was and to not go backwards.

There is a post-it with the ten Buddhist perfections, virtues (https://www.learnreligions.com/paramitas-the-ten-perfections-of-mahayana-buddhism-4590166) that I strive to work on, as well as the Buddhist Noble 8-fold Path (https://tricycle.org/magazine/noble-eightfold-path/). I don't talk or write about Buddhism, religion, or spirituality very much. I know my own practice it is something that I really want to work on more. I want to work on taking time out of my day to meditate as well as putting into practice these values I keep posted right above me.

I grabbed a stack of photographs. Not a stack really, but a flip-book thing as well as some that I keep framed around the office. Grabbing the photos I did in a relatively short time, not taking the entire weekend to go through every individual photo I have, shows me that I really need to digitize all my photos, as well as put together an album of important photos if I ever really needed to leave quickly. The flip-book thing has some photos important to me from over the years, but should probably be updated and would work better put into an album or one of those Shutterfly books.

I packed my diplomas from both high school and college. I packed my athletic letters from high school as well as some academic achievements and letters of recommendation. There are a couple of my running medals, finisher medals from my marathons and a couple from races where I placed in my age group. There are various reminders I keep of achievements over the years both from mental and physical pursuits.

(It is a little strange for me to just be listing off these souvenirs that are important to me but probably aren't so important to anyone else or all that interesting to read about. Again though, this is for myself to look back on, so I'll carry on detailing things.)

There are some little love notes that Jen wrote me and then hid along with these little hearts that she made and hid. There are a couple little pictures the boys made me when they were little.

There are a few things that I've written over the years. There was sort of this underground magazine in high school. I also started writing my own little newsletter when I was in high school in France and carried that over to college - typed and photocopied and snail-mailed in the days before the internet. A blog before blogs. I was presumptuous then to think that anyone would want to read what I wrote, and I've just never stopped presuming that.

I wish that I had kept more of the things I had written in the past. I have some of the decent things I have written, a few of the things that weren't terrible. One of the things about writing is that I never really think that anything that I've written is very good. Some of it is just less terrible than some of the other stuff. There is always room for improvement even in the best of the things that I have done. Maybe that is why I don't organize my writing better -- It is never really completed. There is almost nothing that I would stick in a frame and hang on my wall. I don't know how I would ever come up with more than a handful of pages that I thought was complete let alone being able to publish an entire novel.

All-in-all putting this bag together has demonstrated that I really need to work on organizing these souvenirs and then digitizing them. I really need to pare down on the things that I hold onto including the souvenirs. Did I really need to keep that European Civ final from college that I got a B- on? I may have wanted to remind myself that I once took European Civ. but haven't looked at any of those papers since college. 

Now I am just finishing up with some odds and ends. I packed this red metallic Cross pen that I just absolutely love. I have a matte black one as well, but really love the red. It has sort of a stylus end on the top, which is handy. I really enjoy how it writes. I have a couple basic fountain pens and while I enjoy using them, they are more trouble than they are worth.

And I brought about half a dozen journals. Did I mention those when I mentioned the other books? I have maybe another dozen journals that I either haven't started writing in or just have a bit written in. One of the ones I am bringing is sort of this diary that I make a short entry into every three months or so just to show the passing of time. One is a soft-cover one with The Wave design on it that I keep like a personal journal. There is more personal stuff in there, but also I save that one for when I am high and have some incredible idea, which the next day morphs into just sort of a good, half-baked idea. I used to write in it when I was drunk as well. That really taught me that despite what I might think, my creativity was not improved by whiskey. Then I packed a leather bound one given to me my Jen long ago that I never really put to use yet. Once the Wave journal is filled up, I think that will be the one I probably use most. It is one of those that is almost too nice to foul up with silly writings.

I think I left behind the one where I had started some other story ideas. I also left behind my work "bullet journal", which I can hardly get by without. These different journals each with their little starts here and there at different times - They show me that I really need to be more organized about my writing. I need to compile it into one place. This is good for just the morning pages style journaling, but I need to do better really putting ideas together and sitting down and writing, writing. BY that I mean writing and not typing. Typing is much faster for me, and once I'm on a roll, it makes sense. Writing brings out the creative juices though. I need to organize them into a place and then digitize my writing as well. I have lost so many not-terrible things I have written in the past.

Unpacking series 1, episode 3, Regarding Fish on a Plane

So let's speak of books. First, one of my possessions I've come to prize most is my Amazon Kindle Paperwhite. I have pared down my library significantly. I still have boxes full of books and a couple bookshelves full, but only about a third of what I had. While I love the feel of a real book and being able to mark up pages, being able to have a library at hand is really incredible. It is especially useful if one is packing a bag of their prized possessions and loves books as much as I. Asking me what books I would save and what I would leave to burn is like, well... I'm not talented enough to work a Sophie's Choice joke in here. Let's just say it would be no simple decision.

I decided to include my old edition of Great Expectations as a representation of all the old books I have. It is in two volumes published by the New York Book Company in 1909. Not the oldest books I have, but Great Expectations is one of my favorite books.

I chose my Men's Devotional Bible, New International version from amongst the variety of Bibles I have. It is a good version and probable the most portable Bible I have. I have several Bibles that have more sentimental meaning and are definitely less portable including one that belonged to my grandfather. I have A LOT of Bibles. I'd do well to just use one of them. The Bible will always make my list of desert island books and not because I'm religious. It's just a really good read. There are plenty of the boring this-guy-begat-this-guy-who-begat-this-guy parts, but then there are really interesting parts like Samson just wiping out the Philistines or Daniel and the lions, Jesus and his parables, angels playing trumpets causing hail and fire mixed with blood to rain down upon earth, and the entire book of Leviticus with its craziness. The entire bibliography of Stephen King doesn't have so much imagination.

What the Buddha Taught is honestly a little closer to teaching what I consider my religion. Really, the lessons I've come to through it were probably the same as what Jesus was trying to teach me as a child. It's a straightforward look at Buddhism and its core teachings.

My final book is Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. It's a marvelous book, not about Zen (and not so much about motorcycle maintenance either.) I can't say enough about it. Someday I will devote an entire blog, not just a blog entry, to it. My edition is underlined and highlighted and has tons of those post-it flags, and that is just from reading it through twice. That's the reason I can't leave it behind - all the work I've put into it -- But then the next time I read it will be like the first and I'll rediscover it all over anyway.

I could go on for a while explaining the books that I didn't pack, but as I said, I think I'll leave what got left behind for another entry. I should mention Phaedrus here. I mention Phaedrus because that is the name the narrator of Zen gives his old self. It is also the name I gave my betta fish. All my pets get literary names. Well, not the chickens. Chickens don't get named. I've had Phaedrus since August of 2020, making him the longest lived betta I've had. If you get a betta, don't put them in a tiny, tiny bowl. Yes, they can live in a puddle, but they aren't meant to. Also, get a heater. I have a good heater now to keep his tank at a nice temperature and he gets regular water changes with distilled water. I think this makes a difference. Anyway, enough of my soapbox about betta fish. Still, I guess I would have to leave Phaedrus behind. I am rather tempted to put him in a big ziplock bag and try and carry him onto a flight just to see if I can do it. Supposedly TSA will let you bring a liquid onboard so long as there is a living fish in it. Who knew? Still, I think he'd rather just battle it out in his little warm fish tank until hopefully I returned.

I have enough space here too to add that I also packed my Kindle Fire. It is a little superfluous I think packing the Paperwhite AND the Fire. The paperwhite is just way better for reading with. I like using the Fire when I get in the habit of using it. It is also kind of redundant with my phone though as well. I think if I didn't have access to a laptop, though, I would probably appreciate having the Fire with me. Anyway, it makes me want to get into the habit of using it more often.

Unpacking - Series 1, Episode 2 The Sportsball Edition

 The next little portion of my pile is sportsball related. I included my Champ Bailey Broncos jersey. The Payton Manning jersey I have is definitely nicer, but Champ is my favorite Bronco. I like wearing jerseys. They're tough, good for layering things underneath, and easy to wash. I had to include a Cubs jersey in the bag as well. The home white one I have is really nice, so that one got the nod.

I might as well talk about the baseball caps here as well. I included a Cubs hat, of course. I selected kind of a grubby one that I wear quite a bit. It annoyed me to no end when people claimed I was a fair-weather Cubs fan during the World Series run and the year after. Yes, there were a lot of people who jumped back on the Cubs bandwagon that year, and I was happy to have them climb aboard. I had suffered plenty for many, many years leading up to that point, though. This hat has the sweat if not the blood and tears.

The other hat I chose is my Boise Hawks hat. The Hawks are now an independent minor league team after having been affiliated with the Rockies and then the Cubs. They don't make this particular hat anymore, which is why I chose it as opposed to one of my other minor league hats. I love collecting the minor league hats. They have great logos and sometimes cool stories behind the team names. If I had to reseed a new collection, I'd start it with this Hawks hat.

My Northwestern sweatshirt is in the mix here as well. I have to have a sweatshirt, and going with my alma mater seems the right way to go here. The Champion sweatshirts are always nice. My last Northwestern one lasted over twenty years. Granted, by the end it wasn't something I would really wear out of the house, but I got my use out of it and then some.

The other Northwestern article I included is my Northwestern scarf. (I should add here that I'm really kind of glad that purple is Northwestern's main color. I like purple in the wardrobe.) I don't know why scarves aren't bigger in the U.S. outside of where and when it gets very cold. Of course they are great for freezing weather, but they are useful too in merely chilly conditions. You can wrap or unwrap a scarf to regulate temperatures as needed. Chic Europeans understand this. I'd probably prefer a slightly lighter weight one for regular use, but this one does the trick, and is purple!

I'm bringing four pairs of socks. Now, should I wind up in Florida I probably won't wear socks at all, as I spend all my time in flip-flops. If I only have my bag of stuff, I'll have to pick up some flip-flops as well, because I didn't pack any! I think these four pairs of socks will cover me for whatever I need, though. I am wearing my shark socks. I actually have several pairs of shark socks. These ones are blue and remind me that some days you need to be a shark, just like some days you need to be Flash Gordon. They didn't work all that great today in that regard, to be honest, but they did keep my feet relatively warm. I did pack a warmer pair - SmartWool ski socks. SmartWool socks are pricey but worth it. I've had this pair many, many years and while they've worn pretty thin in places, there are no little holes for my toes to peek out and embarrass me in the airport after going through TSA. (Who am I kidding? I don't take off my shoes like some sort of pleb. I have TSA-Pre!) Those socks are black, though it'd probably be better if I packed a pair of black dress socks as well. Anyway, I needed a brown pair to fill out the triumverate of men's solid sock colors. I chose a brown pair with flamingos on them. Flamingos remind me of Florida.

I chose a couple pairs of non-descript boxer-briefs since going commando for an extended period is kind of eh... stinky. The only thing to say generally is that they are boxer-briefs. I prefer those, particularly to run in. I do have to mention the shark underwear though. Sense there is a theme here? Yeah these ones have some pretty ferocious great whites on them. Also, they have this kind of front packet that is supposed to give the jewels some support. It's a little gimicky. The important thing is that there are sharks.

I put one dress shirt in. Well, it's long-sleeved and has buttons, so sort of dress shirt ish. It's a genuine Rockmount shirt, brown with hops leaves and flowers embroidered in green along with the mother-of-pearl snaps. If you visit Denver, you need to visit the Rockmount shop downtown near the train station. The shirts are awesome and true originals. They are not cheap and with the embroidery, you really have to have them professionally cleaned. But if you ever have an issue with one, you can just take it in to them and they will fix it while you wait. I love them. They create an exceptional product and then back it with great customer service. I have a couple other shirts from them. One is a similar western shirt, but more traditional with swallows in red and white on a black shirt. That one doesn't fit as well as this one and isn't quite as unusual.

I'll finish out unpacking my clothing by talking about the jeans. I packed a pair of plain navy-blue Levi's 501's. For the past couple years, I've only bought 501s, though in different colors, cuts, and sizes. The main reason is that 501s are built to last. I've had Lucky brand jeans. They are expensive and super-comfortable and wear out inside two years. I have 501s that I'm not even super fond of the color anymore, but they will never, ever, ever wear out, so I feel kind of stuck with them. Plus 501s are just cool, and some day I plan on being cool.

That isn't a whole lot of clothing. I should have thrown in a pair of shorts, but nothing was really bringing me joy. No swimsuit because the good swimsuits are down in FL and anyway, I'd rather have an excuse to go naked. (I'd be a nudist if I could.) I should probably throw in another pair of 501s. I also have a ton of dress shirts that I really do like, but they are all still hanging in dry cleaning bags from 2019. I really am hoping that we will have more opportunities to "dress up" again in 2022 and that my nice clothes and shoes can make a reappearance. For now though, I gave the space over to books.

To be continued

Unpacking; series 1, episode 1

 This entry is really as much anticipated by myself as it probably is by any of you. I've been looking forward to writing it, but this virus has really slowed me down. I'm in a brain fog owing either to the virus directly or to the enormous amount of guaifenesin in my bloodstream. So, if this isn't the most coherent blog entry, I'm blaming it on Covid. Let's try and get started anyway.

First, let me say that it is fortunate that I have a pretty awesome bag to pack full in the first place. Even if I were simply making a list of prized possessions, I would include this carryon bag (https://www.nordstrom.com/s/briggs-riley-28-inch-expandable-wheeled-trunk/5447358?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&breadcrumb=Home%2FAll%20Results&color=001). In packing it for this, the Inaugural Packing of the Bag, it was very nice that it expands out and that I could really tug on the zippers without being afraid of wrecking them.

I'm not exactly sure where to start with writing this. I have everything laid out on the living room floor, so I think I will attempt to proceed in a somewhat organized manner at one edge of this pile and proceed through writing about an article and then putting it away. This is going to be a long, probably wordy process. I could condense some of this, but I need to remind myself that I am writing this for the purpose of comparing this in subsequent years and for my own posterity. So I apologize for the detail. Also, in putting this bag together several other blog ideas came to me like why I left out certain items or things that it has occurred to me to improve on for next year. So I hopefully will have a bunch of blog entries to come out of this rather than trying to fit all this into one entry. (I can already tell that what would make this entry much better would be a good editor. Blame the Covid.)

The first items to come off the pile then are a couple of t-shirts. Both are white and interestingly have colored cuffs on the necks and sleeves. One has navy cuffs and says "I <3 Toxic Waste". It's a joke. I don't really love toxic waste. It was the same one (I mean, not the exact same one, but a replica) work by Val Kilmer's character in the movie "Real Genius". The t-shirt reminds me of that movie and brings me joy. It reminds me of a friend's advice to not shrink from our talents. I feel like maybe if I dress like a "genius" it will help me to feel smart on days when I might need it. While I'm a proud member of Mensa, I didn't really relate to the characters in the movie (certainly not the Kilmer character) so much as it reminds me of the true genius friends I have made. Back when the movie was popular it reminded me of my friends from Center for Talent Development. Now it reminds me of Mensa friends in Firehouse - what a bunch of weirdo, rebel, misfits we are; don't fuck with us though!

The second shirt is cuffed in red and is my Flash Gordon t-shirt. As a kid I was into comic books the same as most other kids. I liked Superfriends. I had Superman underoos. Flash Gordon to me was a different kind of hero. He didn't have super powers beyond what one would need to be the starting quarterback for the New York Jets. (Feel free to insert your own Jets joke here.) Just a mortal dude saving the universe by beaning bad guys in the heads with melons. The Marvel Universe just won't compare to the Flash Gordon movie of my youth (and one of the greatest movie soundtracks ever recorded). The Flash Gordon shirt is my underoos holdover for when I need to feel like a super hero.

A third t-shirt that isn't pictured because it is currently in the wash is the now infamous "Bennifer" shirt. Lots of reasons for this one: It is a reminder of the best day ever, it includes my anniversary date so that I won't forget it, it amuses me how Jen and I came up with the idea (thanks, Ben Affleck's SNL monologue), it's the trivia team uniform (no, I don't think I would actually wear it to trivia), and it is black in contrast to these other two white t-shirts.

I packed a couple of workout shirts. One is from the Colfax half-marathon that I did with my brother. I really like the half-marathon distance. I have probably mentioned that in this blog before. The other is a tech shirt from the Pat's Run race I did virtually after reading the book about Pat Tillman. While Flash Gordon is my make-believe super hero, the U.S. Marines have been my real life super heroes. I wanted to be Flash as a kid and I wish I could be a Marine as an adult. If you know my ROTC past, you know I didn't actually go down that road. When it comes down to it, I don't regret it - I'm where I am supposed to be in life, and the USMC wasn't where I was supposed to be - however, part of me still wishes I had what it took to do it at the time. I greatly admire the men and women who do have what it takes to be a Marine, and Pat Tillman epitomizes that to me. He was a complicated person who loved his country but not always everything that it did. Pat Tillman didn't blindly love everything about the United States, particularly the federal government, but he was willing to sacrifice absolutely everything in order to protect it. I love all that he stands for and how he stands in for every Marine and servicemember who is willing to sacrifice even several years of their lives.

(Boy, this is really going to take a long time to get through. That's okay. It means I won't need to turn to some random writing prompt in order to get my words down each morning, for a while. Normally I think I'd prefer to keep these entries right around 1000 words, but I think I will add one more, because I don't want to end on something so schmaltzy as my love of Marines.)

The last article I'll talk about for now is the Dexter Kill Shirt. The Kill Shirt is a long sleeved thermal "fatigue-style" shirt that Dexter typically wore when he was stalking his victims in the original series. If it were something that was still being made, I would have left it, as it is just a bit too small on me. The company that made it was a truly terrible company called American Apparel. I actually had qualms buying the shirt initially because of that, but karma caught up with them anyway. I wouldn't mind the shirt being too small if it were too small to fit over my buff, rather than chunky, frame. I tell myself I will get into that sort of shape again one day. It's also incredibly utilitarian. lightweight but with long sleeves so is perfect for layering. The reason I keep it, though, goes with the theme of why I kept most the clothes I kept. I wear it when shit needs to get taken care of. I wear it because of how it makes me feel - not like a serial killer, but like someone who is going to get shit accomplished today regardless of what it takes.

To be continued